Pokemon Presents Review - 2023 Edition

Okay. I needed several moments after that to calm myself down. I’m sure people who saw that were hype over Pokemon Sleep cause it’s been one of those rare unicorn things of “where is it?” But I gotta say…this was not a good presents. Last years was better. And I question why Nintendo did what the did at their direct. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Here’s the video, 25min and 47 seconds long:

I want to start with my thoughts first and then I’ll get into what I got right but I know if I do it will just be a rant. So…

WHAT I GOT RIGHT

• There was Pokemon GO updates but not in the way I expected.

• And that’s it…

There were a few things I know they discuss at every event that I mention and hoped they would leave out cause…who cares? Like Pokemon Masters EX, Cafe Remix, and Unite. But they went over those. You can watch the video above if you care to know what’s up there. I don’t play those games very much so I can’t speak to how “awesome” those updates actually are.

MY THOUGHTS

Okay, let’s start with the wind up pitch that Pokemon made. It all started with the backdrop. Why on Earth would you dare to put ALL of the previous games going all the way back to the first games behind you and not mention anything about Pokemon GB/GBC/GBA games coming to the Switch in NSO? I mean, why else did Nintendo bring those consoles out when they did? Were we all just that naive to assume it was for TPC? Ugh. It was just so hard to watch. The first half was all things I couldn’t care less about:

• Pokemon World Championships 2023 for the first time in Japan. Reveal of artwork for the event. Yay…

• Pokemon collaboration with Netflix. Stop motion animation called Pokemon Concierge following an employee at this resort who takes care of Pokemon and their trainers who visit. They showed literally a few seconds of what it will look like. Not all that enthused.

• Unite update about its 2nd year and 100+m downloads. Again, don’t really care. Oh and Zacian is now in the game.

• Cafe Remix now has the Paldea starters.

• Masters EX is in it’s 3.5 year anniversary and adds Galar region characters to the storyline.

By this time we’ve reached the halfway mark and all we got was a tease that Scarlet/Violet updates were coming. Oh, need I mention they said nil about when the actual update we know is coming is actually going to be available. Which is odd cause they took the time to release a laundry list of what those updates would entail. I wonder if they really weren’t ready to push that update or if they discovered there was much more that needed fixing and are holding it back a bit longer? We’ll see…

Now comes Pokemon Sleep. I’ve heard of this thing. Had no real idea what it was or what it’s intended for. Till now. My initial thought was, “oh this looks cool.” Then it quickly changed for some reason to, “oh, this is starting to feel weird and creepy.” I think what bothered me most was that this feature is aimed at adults. Okay, don’t get me wrong, I am…almost 40…and I’ll probably go to my grave playing Pokemon for as long as my hands and mind will allow me. But there was just something about seeing these adults (most single and some couples) in bed while Pokemon are simulated sleeping beside them, just seemed a bit odd to me. Like that’s taking the fact that TPC knows adults play their games a bit too far? Maybe I’m reading too much into it. Anyway, the premise of Pokemon Sleep, if you don’t know, is to let your phone track your sleeping habits and while you “catch” (the video was vague on that) some Pokemon they will sleep when you sleep and depending on how you sleep they will be rested(?) again, vague. The slogan is “rest your very best” which is very clever. And they said the purpose is to give us all a game to look forward to waking up for in the morning. Okay. But beside this feeling like a bit of a cash grab and very Pokemon Cafe-like, I’m not seeing the appeal for me. It’s expected to release on handheld devices Summer 2023.

Then they reveal what is the silliest name for a device I think I’ve heard in a long time. The Pokemon GO+ Plus?! Seriously?! What did you need TWO pluses for?

It’s some silly device you’re supposed to be able to use with Pokemon GO and eventually Pokemon Sleep. The mechanics of it I just don’t understand and quite frankly, I don’t care to understand. It’s going to be available July 14 with more information to come.

At this point there are mere MINUTES left to this and they have said nothing about what I’m expecting to hear.

SPOILER ALERT: There was nothing to be said about Pokemon Gens I - III coming to NSO. Period.

Okay, now we reach the point of Pokemon Scarlet and Violet DLC. Again, disappointed because I was hoping we’d get something of substance today. But, we didn’t. At least, not really.

Here are the bullet points I gathered while watching:

• Two new paradox Pokemon: Walking Wake (Scarlet) and Iron Leaves (Violet). Only caught via raid battle and starts today. I’m not sure if this is for EVERYONE or only those who’ve gotten far enough to see 6 and 7 star dens.

• Starting today (I think?) if you do something to connect your GO postcards to SV then it will change the patterns of Vivillon in the game to catch. Not sure of these mechanics as I think it involves meeting with people from across the country and globe to get these postcards to do this magic trick. Not for me.

• Home connectivity briefly mentioned for Scarlet/Violet coming “early 2023” which, to me, means now or at least in March? Cause anything after that then we are in Q2 of 2023 and headed towards the Summer. So I’m guessing in the next month.

And now the real meat and potatoes of the SV DLC we all knew had to be coming:

The Hidden Treasure of Area Zero. Here is the two minute segment for it where the last like 45 seconds are the most important part. Images of what’s most important to follow:

Here’s what’s coming:

And that’s all she wrote, folks. If you were expecting Gen I - III announcements, well, this presents or this day just wasn’t for you. Will they be coming at all? It just doesn’t seem right that they wouldn’t. My guess, at this point, because they were no where to be found in this presents is that they are coming but for money. They will likely package the games in some way that they will be available in NSO but we’ll have to pay for them either one at a time or in bundles. If they never come…well, let’s not think about that right now. Let’s just hold out hope that something big is coming and that big thing is the old games.

I intentionally left one thing out from the presentation that had me mildly interested in one aspect of TPC that I never really cared much about: The Card Game. They introduced Pokemon Trading Card Classic. I’m not sure if it’s just the game or the board comes with the very expensive set. But it reminded me of the classic cards and it looked worth getting as a collector. Very cool.